Videos with tag Terrorist
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Jackass Terrorist Prank

not mine but i decided to upload it because its so funny!

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 541 | Comments: 0

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Achmed The Dead Terrorist - Ölü Terörist Achmed - Türkce

Ölü terörist Achmed, Türkçe altyazili. Achmed The Dead Terrorist - Turkish Subtitled

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 744 | Comments: 0

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Jeff Dunham- Achmed the Dead Terrorist- Jingle Bombs

Achmed likes to sing christmas carols. I dedicate this video to my dad, who is being deployed to Afghanistan this year(he likes Achmed). I do not own this vid i simply uploaded it for Youtubers.

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 632 | Comments: 0

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Achmed, the dead terrorist (Jeff Dunham)

Achmed, the dead terrorist... (Jeff Dunham, ventriloquist & stand-up comedian, "Spark of Insanity", 2007) Good evening, Achmed!~Good evening... Infidel!~So you 're a terrorist?~Yes, I am a terrorist...~What kind of terrorist?~A terrifying... terrorist!~Are you scared?~Not really, no.~Aaargh! And now?~Not really, no.~HuHaaah! How 'bout now?~No.~God damn it! Oh.. I mean "Allah" damn it! Silence! I kill you!~So Akhmed...~No, no, it's Achmed~That's what I said!~No you said Akmed, it's Achmed! "gh", "gh", "gh"... Silence! I kill you!~How do you spell it?~What?~How do you spell your name?~Oh, let's see... A... C... Phlemgh... Silence! I kill you!~So Achmed, if you're a terrorist, I would suppose you have some sort of specialty?~Yes, I am a suicide bomber.~So you' re finished?~What?~You 've done your job.~No, I haven't!~But you 're dead!~No, I'm not! I feel fine!~But you 're all bone!~It's a flesh wound!~Silence! I kill you! What the hell happened to my feet? Son of a bitch! What the hell? What are you doing? Stop touching me! I kill you!~Allright, just hold on, we'll fix this!~Ok, wait! What are you doing? Holy crap I'm in the air! Wait, something is backwards... holy crap! I need some ligaments!~Just sit still!~Ok, I will not move my ass!~You idiot, you don't have an ass!~Is that Walter?~Yeah...~He scares the crap out of me! Please, do not put me back in the same suitcase!~Why?~He has gas!~Saddam's mustard gas was nothing compared to a Walter fart!~It's not funny! He will kill us!~Allright, listen Achmed, I have something to tell you...~What?~You really are dead!~Are you sure?~Yes.~I've just got my flu shot.~You really are dead!~Wait, if I'm dead, that means I get my 72 virgins?~Are you my virgins?! I hope not!~Why?~There's a bunch of ugly ass guys out there!~If this is paradise, I've been screwed!~Well did they say it will be only female virgins?~Holy crap! Wait, I could have Clay Aiken! I told a joke!~So, listen Achmed, where do you come from?~Your freakin' suitcase!~I told another one!~Look, if you've been in my suitcase all this time, how have we been getting through security at the airports?~Oh, that's easy... They open the case and I go "Hellooo! I am Lindsay Lohan!"~I told another joke! I can do this crap too! Ok, here's another one: Two Jews walkin' in a bar...~No, no!~What, you don't let Jews in your bar? You racist bastard!~What I mean is I don't want racist jokes in my act.~Oh, ok, how 'bout if I kill the Jews?~No!~I'm kidding, I would not kill the Jews, no, I would toss a penny betwenn them and watch them fight to the death! Yes, I did the same thing with two catholic priests but I tossed in a small boy! Yes, and the winner had to fight Michael Jackson!~Achmed!~What?~Stop doing this! You can't tell jokes like that!~Why not? I'm killing so to speak...~You can't tell jokes like that!~Why?~It offends people.~Oh, I'm dead what do I care? What do you want me to do "knock-knock" jokes?~Probably better...~Ok, knock-knock.~Who's there?~Me, I kill you!~So, look as a suicide bomber have you had training?~Of course, we had this suicide bomber training camp.~Ah, is that a nice facility?~It used to be...~What happened?~New guy! The idiot tried to practise!~What did you guys learn from that?~Location, location, location~So, you guys have any kind of motto?~Like what?~You know, like "we're looking for a few good men"~"We're looking for some idiots with no future"!~So, where do you get your recruits?~The suicide hotline! That was dark, was it not?~Yeah, so what exactly happened to you?~Eh?~What happened?~Oh, if you must know, I am a horrible suicide bomber...~What happened?~I had a premature detonation...~I set the timer for 30 minutes, but it went off in 4 seconds! You know what that's like, right?! Mr hurricane!~So, Achmed what exactly happened to you?~Well, I was getting gasoline and I answered my cell phone... "Can you hear me now?" Kghghgh! At first I thought it was because I went over my minutes!~That's too bad!~It's ok, I took that Verizon bastard with me!~So, what's it like to die? Do you see a white light?~If you done enough to watch the explosion, yes!~No, I mean some people say when they die they see a white light, what did you see?~I saw flying car parts!~What was the last thing that went through your mind?~My ass! Walter told me to tell that joke!~You did all these for a bunch of virgins?~Are you kidding me? I'd kill you for a Klondike bar!~So, I guess you're Muslim?~I don't think so!~You're not Muslim?~Nooo!~Why?~Look on my ass, it says "Made in China"! Walter says I'm just a stinking Halloween decoration!~So do you like being in D.C.?~I think some idiots must live here.~Why?~For example, the Washington Monument...~Yes?~It looks nothing like the guy! It looks more like a tribute to Bill Clinton!~What do you think of Bush?~Oh, I love Bu... Oh, you mean the president? I'm sorry!~And that's Achmed, the dead terrorist!

Channels: Humor 

Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 714 | Comments: 0

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Ahmad the dead terrorist - subtitled

Ahmad the dead terrorist subtitled

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 441 | Comments: 0

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Achmed The Dead Terrorist - Christmas Special

Whaaa The Dead TerroristJeff Dunham, born in 1968[citation needed] in Dallas, Texas, is an American ventriloquist and stand-up comedian. A graduate of Baylor University, he has performed at comedy clubs across the U.S. since the late 1980s. He has also appeared on numerous television shows, including The Tonight Show, where on his 1990 debut he was invited to sit on Johnny Carsons couch,[1] Late Show with David Letterman, and Comedy Central Presents in 2003. In January 2008 Dunham was voted #1 comedian in Comedy Central's Stand-Up Showdown.[2] Contents [hide] 1 Personal life 2 Cast 3 Comedy Central specials 4 References 5 External links Personal life Dunham is married to his wife Paige and has three daughters, Kenna, Ashlyn, and Bree. Paige made a cameo appearance in the intro of Spark of Insanity. His youngest daughters made a cameo appearance in the special feature "Ask Santa" on the Very Special Christmas Special DVD. He owns one male golden retriever, Bill, and three chihuahuas, Darby, Jake, and Rusty. He also owns the original Hummer and a blue Toyota Prius. He makes fun of the latter as a running gag in his Spark of Insanity special. When not touring, he resides in Los Angeles, California. Cast Main article: List of Jeff Dunham puppets Dunham's ventriloquist act includes seven puppets, known by his fans as the "Suitcase Posse"[3]: Peanut, the purple woozle[4] Walter, a bitter old curmudgeon José Jalapeño on a Stick, a talking jalapeño pepper on a stick Achmed the Dead Terrorist, the skeleton of a dead suicide bomber Bubba J, a beer drinking redneck. Melvin, the Superhero [5] Sweet Daddy D, Jeff's "manager" Comedy Central specials His first special, Jeff Dunham: Arguing With Myself, was taped in Santa Ana, California. It was released on DVD in April 2006. In this stand-up offering, Dunham opens his show playing straight-man to his usual crew and includes two other characters: Sweet Daddy D and Bubba J, in place of Achmed and Melvin. His second special "Jeff Dunham: Spark of Insanity" was taped at the Warner Theater in Washington, D.C.. It was available at Redbox stands on September 4, 2007, and was released on DVD on September 18, 2007. A Christmas special was taped at the Pabst Theater in Milwaukee, Wisconsin and premiered on Comedy Central as Jeff Dunham's Very Special Christmas Special on Sunday, November 16, 2008. It became available on DVD and Blu-Ray on November 18, 2008.[6] The special's premiere was the highest rated telecast in Comedy Centrals history. [7] In addition to these specials, Dunham also released his first music album, Don't Come Home for Christmas, on November 4, 2008. It contains original Christmas songs as well as a parody of "Jingle Bells" by Achmed entitled "Jingle Bombs". All the songs, with the exception of "Jingle Bombs", were written and accompanied by Brian Haner, who has recently joined Dunham's act as "Guitar Guy".

Channels: Humor 

Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 595 | Comments: 0

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Achmed The Dead Terrorist(Part 1)

Achmed the Dead Terrorist(Part 1) from Jeff Dunham's Comedy Central and new DVD, Spark Of Insanity. I encourage you all to go out and by it, it is worth it Check out my great friend, Thienieboydtv; http://www.youtube.com/user/Thieniebo... New Achmed the dead terrorist (Part 2) And Part 1 = verry funny You can buy Achmed The Dead Terrorist ===Where To Buy=== Log onto www.jeffdunham.com, there he has a link to Amazon.com where you can purchase the full dvd. ^^ ---Check out my great friend,Thienieboydtv; http://www.youtube.com/user/Thieniebo... New Version ╔═╦╗╔╦╗╔═╦═╦╦╦╦╗╔═╗ ║╚╣║║║╚╣╚╣╔╣╔╣║╚╣═╣ ╠╗║╚╝║║╠╗║╚╣║║║║║═╣ NOW!!!!Please!!! ╚═╩══╩═╩═╩═╩╝╚╩═╩═╝ to get new videos!! Silence! I kill you! XD

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 649 | Comments: 0

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Achmed Le Terroriste Mort

Petit sketch d'un ventriloque américain

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 505 | Comments: 0

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Jeff Dunham - Achmed The Dead Terrorist Official Video

Jeff Dunham performing Achmed The Dead Terrorist LIVE!!

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 607 | Comments: 0

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Jeff Dunham - Achmed The Dead Terrorist

jeff dunham doing one of his most funny sketches, achmed the dead terrorist

Channels: Humor 

Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 556 | Comments: 0

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Achmed the dead terrorist sing Jingle Bombs

jingle bombs achmed

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 639 | Comments: 0

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Ahmad The Hilarious Dead Terrorist

Master ventriloquist Jeff Dunham's extraordinary performance with 'Ahmad the Dead Terrorist'

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Added: 5041 days ago by blogpost_biz

Runtime: 01:00 | Views: 718 | Comments: 0

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